Swoon: True Blood Season 5 Episode 2: Authority Always Wins

All the ones of him in a suit are copyrighted. Frick. (Gage Skidmore via Flickr)

Review of the second episode of True Blood season 5. SPOILERS! 

Well, my, oh my, Alexander Skarsgard, I think both you and I were born in the wrong century. Edwardian dress doesn’t usually do too much for me, but the sight of Eric Northman in top-hat and tails did make me go a bit wibbly inside. I always enjoy this show’s flashbacks to the most random eras in history (American civil war, Viking Sweden, punk-era London) which always convey how sinister and covert vampires were before they ‘came out of the coffin’.

Pam is worried about her maker; she hasn’t seen him for days and he’s uncontactable. So she starts reminiscing back to how they met. It’s 1905 in San Francisco and Pam is madam in a brothel who finds one of her girls horrifically murdered- as we know, she’s been drained by a vampire. Pam is later attacked while walking home and is rescued by a dashing, Nordic stranger… guess who? Swoon.

That was a highlight for me in an episode which saw a little too much focus on Sam and co. OK, any focus is too much, and I really don’t know why the werewolves leave me so cold. I love wolves. Maybe it’s because they all look like they’ve been at the meth in human form, and wolves are, you know, more noble. Anyway, Sam and Luna split up (for now) because he advises her to let her daughter spend time with her grandmother (not an entirely unreasonable request). He also asks Luna what she’ll do if Emma becomes a wolf. Luna says she knows Emma’s a shifter, she can feel it in her bones. Which means she’s a wolf, of course.

Probably the first time we’ve had a really comic scene in Bon Temps police station since Season 1, but I laughed out loud at Jason being punched by a 13 year old boy, the son of a woman he’d slept with. “Oh, crazy Sharon?!” he said when he finally remembered who she was.

Andy, who has grown on me in the last few seasons, has also managed to hook up with Merlottes’ waitress Holly, but her teen sons aren’t too impressed.

We know that Russell Edgington is back, and we got a glimpse of him, rather gruesomely, in bits, just at the close of the episode. Eric and Bill spent most of the episode being tortured, and we learned more about the Sangustini, and something called the vampire Bible. If you’re curious look up the Jewish story of Lilith, Adam’s first wife.

Jason tries to make up with Hoyt, who has turned from soft-spoken mammy’s boy to shouty, sweary mammy’s boy. Jason is troubled. He seems to go through these existiential crises every season, but this one is a humdinger. And there are no creepy panther hillbillies in sight.

Lafayette and Sookie are still struggling with Tara, who is batshit insane. She spent most of the episode smashing up Sookie’s house, which is only just clean after the maenad/Debbie goo.

This episode was another solid one overall, but it’s the sight of Eric in that suit that will linger with me. Sigh.

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